You know that in life, you go through phases.

You start out as an infant, totally dependent on others for what you need. You’re not aware, you don’t have a sense of what’s going on around you, and you scream loudly to get your selfish needs met. It’s all about you — and you don’t even know how to consider the bigger picture.

After awhile, you start to realize there’s more to the world than just you, and you find out you can impact your environment. Things are intertwined, cause and effect is in play, and you can make it work to your advantage.

And at some point, you fully take charge, with a clear knowledge that your life is what you make it. You understand that things don’t just happen — it’s up to you to direct your life.

Your business life is like that too.

There are three phases an entrepreneur goes through in business, much like the phases of life.

Phase 1

When you first start your business, you come out kicking and screaming. You have a lot of energy! But you aren’t that aware of what’s going on around you, you don’t really know how it all works — you’re just focused on getting your business needs met (gotta get clients, gotta make money, gotta have a great logo, gotta have a killer website). You get stuck in the weeds a lot. You might have scattered or unrealistic goals, if you even have goals at all.

And then you grow.

Phase 2

If you’re lucky, you survive. Maybe you’re in the weeds a bit less. You start to get an idea of what’s really needed to make your business work, like a real purpose and vision, business confidence, an understanding of your value to the customer, clear messaging and visibility, productivity, team support, and a good financial mindset, but you may not know exactly how to put the pieces together. There’s more to it than you thought, and parts of it you’d just as soon ignore. You keep on plugging.

Eventually, it all comes together for you.

Phase 3

Hopefully, after you’ve been in business long enough, the parts start to gel, and you understand the importance of how they work together. It’s clear you need to be in charge.

These phases are fairly predictable for small service businesses, even if you don’t immediately recognize you’re in a phase. The challenge is not only to become aware of the phase you’re in, but to keep growing and moving along the path.

Want to know which phase you fit into? Download a complimentary copy of The Three Phases of a Small Business Person now to gauge your progress.

When I first started my marketing communications firm in 1984, I didn’t think about whether I could do it or not, I just knew the wolf was at my door. The large corporation I worked for was leaving town and I wasn’t going with it. I needed work and I needed it fast, so I hung out my shingle without a lot of thought. It was later that the terror set in.

Because every project meant I could buy toothpaste or peanut butter for the kid (and maybe both!), I took everything that came my way, saying “yes,” whether I thought I could handle it or not. This quickly led me into situations where I was clearly over my head — or at least I thought so at the time. Soon I was “acting as if” most of the time and was forced to become very resourceful at finding ways to solve client problems. Despite the fact that I didn’t know “how” to run a business, I plowed ahead — pretending that I did, and hoping no one would find out otherwise.

After being in business for about four years, I ran across this short poem — I wish I could remember where — and it stopped me in my tracks.

When I grow up
I’ll carry a stick
And be very dignified.
I’ll have a watch
That will really tick.
My house will be tall
And built of brick.
And no one will guess
That it’s just a trick
And I’m really myself inside.
— Anonymous

Funny thing is, by then, my business was doing really well. I had several full-time employees, steady clients, and a reliable income. By taking on every challenge, I had proven to my clients that I could do it — I could solve their problems, I could run a successful business.

It really wasn’t a “trick” anymore. I did it. Me.

The final step was for me to realize that it wasn’t a trick. I needed to believe it, myself. I could stop pretending and just believe I could do it.

This is something I run into with my coaching clients a lot. And I really try to identify it early, this “I-don’t-know-how-to-run-a-business-so-I-might-fail-or-maybe-I’m-not-cut-out-to-do-this-and-who-am-I-anyway-to-be-thinking-I-can-ask-people-to-pay-me-like-I’m-some-sort-of-guru-or-something?” thing.

Is this you? Somewhere deep inside, at some level, do you fear that people might “find out” you don’t know what you’re doing?

When, in truth, you really do. You know something really well — or you wouldn’t be running a business. Seriously. I’m right, aren’t I?

There’s no trick.

Here’s the best business strategy I can give you, my Business Strategy 101:

Make sure your business is based around something you do really well, and that you have a passion for it. Then believe you can do it better than anyone else can.

“If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more, and become more, you are a leader.” — John Quincy Adams

Are you a leader?

Just because you own a business or have a team doesn’t necessarily mean you’re a leader. All of us have known someone in a leadership position who wasn’t really a leader, and you know what I’m talking about. Hopefully that doesn’t describe you.

I’ve always been fascinated by the idea of leadership, and what it really means. So I’ve come up with this list of questions, some mine and some gathered from different places, to help you think about your own qualifications as a leader.

1. Do your team members or others follow you?

2. Do you enable problems or solve problems for your team?

3. Do you inspire people to dream more, learn more, do more, and become more?

4. Do you have a vision you can communicate to your team? Have you communicated it to your team?

5. Do you have influence . . .  or just authority?

6. Can you encourage people to accomplish things because they want to or because you want them to?

7. Do you accept the status quo or do you change it?

8. Do you do things right, or do you do the right things?

9. Do you ask how and when, or what and why?

Think about these questions for a bit, chew on them. Don’t you feel like a better leader already? Leadership is something you can work on. If you think you want to hone your leadership skills, there are a number of organizational leadership training programs at colleges and universities. Every business owner should aspire to become a better leader.

Part 3: How to Be a Better Leader: Be More Follow-Able

“Leaders aren’t born, they are made. And they are made just like anything else, through hard work. And that’s the price we’ll have to pay to achieve that goal, or any goal.” — Vince Lombardi

So what does it mean to be a leader? What does it take, and do you have what it takes?

I put this question to one of my coaching clients last summer. She was a bit nervous, because she had big visions for her company and wanted it to grow into multiple businesses, and had picked up the term “CEO.” People had told her she had to have a “CEO mindset,” and that she had to step up and be the CEO of her business.

What’s the difference between being a CEO or a leader for small businesses?

The dictionary defines a CEO as:

“The highest-ranking executive in a company or organization, responsible for carrying out the policies of the board of directors on a day-to-day basis.”

This was the definition my client had in her head about being a CEO, and it was what she believed she had to do in order to run her own business. It also made her nervous because it sounded too corporate and she didn’t know if she could live up to it. Besides, she didn’t even have a board of directors.

And she admitted she didn’t really know what it meant.

So we talked about leadership instead. I gave her this quote with her homework:

“Leadership is solving problems. The day soldiers stop bringing you their problems is the day you have stopped leading them.” — Colin Powell

We talked about the fact that you need to have followers to be a leader. Someone has to want to follow you.

Suddenly her whole energy changed. Solving problems and having people follow her sounded exciting and do-able to her.

And that very day, she became a leader.

Part 2: Are You a Good Leader? Take This Leadership Quiz

For 18 years I thought I was crazy.

I owned my own business and there wasn’t anything in the world I wanted to do more, but I thought I was crazy to do it. And I thought it was crazy they let me do it. All I knew was that it kinda felt like the right thing to do, even though I didn’t have a clue how to go about it. I was just feeling my way, day after day, hoping and praying that I was doing it right enough to be able to pay the mortgage and buy juice boxes for my kid.

No one knew
No one knew I thought I was crazy, I don’t think. After all, I had clients and employees. And things buzzed along. But I was just making it up, sort of hoping no one would find out . . . that I was crazy.

As the years went by and no one found out, I got more brazen. “Well, if they don’t know I’m crazy, maybe I can push it a bit more.” I didn’t talk to anyone. I didn’t get any advice. It felt a bit naughty, a bit delicious, a bit thrilling to be so crazy. I could say, “Things will be like this,” and, by golly, things were “like this.” And when I looked over my shoulder, it was okay. The Business Police were not coming to arrest me or drag me off to the looney bin or tell me I was doing it wrong.

I was making it up
Sometimes I felt like telling on myself. It was like when I got home from the hospital after my son was born, and I was absolutely dumbstruck that they let me walk out of there with that thing when it was totally obvious that I didn’t have a clue what to do with it. And here I was, running a business, with people working for me, and I didn’t have a clue how to do it. I was making it up. Should I be allowed to do that?

And so it went for the first 18 years of my business.

And then I met some other people who were crazy too. My god! There were other people JUST. LIKE. ME. These people shunned traditional jobs, they stuck their necks out year after year. They owned businesses and had employees and made it up as they went along.

Of course I didn’t find this out right away. At first I didn’t know they were crazy — they hid it well, just like me. We met at an industry conference and decided to get together to support each other, and for the first few meetings we danced around and kept at a distance, posturing. But we couldn’t keep it up, and now it’s been seven years of meeting four times a year. I like it so much I found a second group of entrepreneurs for support, and we’re well into our second year.

We’re all crazy together
So I no longer think I’m crazy. Now I know I’m crazy — you have to be crazy to be an entrepreneur. And there are no rules, no one else decides whether you’re qualified to run a business or not, you don’t get a certificate — you are the one who decides. You are the one who is bold and creative and out there.

If you’re an entrepreneur, you know it. Because you have to be crazy.

My dad always told me I could be whatever I wanted to be, but I’m not sure he realized how much I took his words to heart. Ahead of his time, Dad encouraged his daughters to seek careers that would allow them to support themselves — meaning, getting jobs in any field a man could. This was in the late 60’s, when women still weren’t expected to go too far. He didn’t think I’d be an entrepreneur. But he did know that I was different.

I remember a dinner one evening years ago, as I was just starting my business, when the conversation centered on a family member who hated his dangerous job. “Tom,” the family said, still had quite a few years to go until he could retire, and it was awful that he had so many years to go, doing a job he disliked so much. I’d heard the story before and decided to say something. “If Tom is so miserable in his job, why doesn’t he just quit and find something else to do, something he likes?” Everyone got quiet. My dad raised his eyebrow and quietly said, “Well, Marcia, everyone isn’t like you.”

It really stuck in my mind when my dad told me that “everyone isn’t like me.” After awhile, I came to know that he was right, and gave my own meaning to the phrase based on what I learned from my own experience and working with other entrepreneurs.

1. Not everyone can take control and make something out of nothing
You’re an entrepreneur. An entrepreneur. That’s really something, you know. You’re taking control of your life, of your circumstances. Whether it seems like it to you or not, you’re taking considerable initiative and risk. You don’t take the easy way out.

And you’ve made something out of nothing. Wow, just think about that. Even if you’ve taken over something that already existed, you’re improving it, tweaking it, breathing life into it. Creating.

Not everyone can do that. Even if they want to, not everyone thinks the way you do, they don’t grab control of circumstances like you do, they don’t know they have the power, like you do. You know this. You know there are people you can talk to about what you do and those who just don’t understand. It’s not a reflection on them, there are probably things they can do that you can’t. You’re just different this way; you can take control and make things out of nothing.

2. No one cares as much as you do
One of the biggest shocks I got when I started my own business, and this sounds really obvious, was that no one else was as obsessed with my business as I was. Preposterous! My business was the most interesting thing going. But no one wanted to talk about it incessantly like I did — at the beginning, only my pre-teen-aged son was available for dinner conversations (and he actually was a great listener)!

Does your spouse want to hear about your business all the time? Is he really all that interested? Bet not. How about your team, if you have one? Even if you’ve got the best employees and/or assistants around, are they coming to you all the time with great ideas for business building? Is anyone 100% focused on your business 24/7 like you are? A friend of mine once put it this way, and I think it perfectly sums it up — the cheese really does stand alone. You care. It’s your baby.

3. Not everyone will understand you
People will marvel and think you’re strange. Your team will think you have your head in the clouds, and will often look at you like deer caught in the headlights. Your parents will have a difficult time understanding why you don’t go get a real job. Your spouse may think your business is just a hobby, and of course you can pick up the dry cleaning and do errands during the day. Friends think you’re raking in the dough and can always pick up the lunch tab and take huge amounts of time off. No one who has not run their own business will have a clue what you do every day or why you’re doing it.

4. You’re not crazy
You’re different, and that’s a good thing! Recognize and celebrate the fact that not everyone can take control and make something out of nothing. (There’s no need to flaunt it, though! That’s a downward staircase that will get you nowhere.) It’s true that no one cares as much as you do, just as not everyone wants to help you plan your next vacation or hear about every cute thing your baby did. Even if they work with you or are married to you, no one will care about your business as much as you do. Accept it and don’t force it on anyone. And not everyone will understand you or what you are doing — that’s okay too. Just understanding these things about yourself and your situation will take a lot of stress off of you. You’re not crazy and you’re not alone.

There is hope, though — there are people who will come very close to understanding you and caring as much as you do if you look for them. Find or put together a peer group or mastermind group of business owners where you can share ideas and challenges. Seek them out — these people are different, too!

Okay, you’ve got your own business. You started it, like most entrepreneurs, so you could have more control over your own destiny, more freedom to do what you’re passionate about, and to “be your own boss.”

Find out anything surprising about being your own boss? Or about being a boss out there on your own, period?

I did.

1.) I thought I’d “magically” be more productive on my own
One of the first things that hit me in the face like a blast of cold air was that I had no one to answer to. “Terrific!” I thought. “Fan-dango-tastic! I can do exactly what I want to do.”

Problem was, I didn’t always know the right thing to do. And even when I did, I didn’t always do it.

First off, as a new entrepreneur, I found it impossible to work at home. Having always been in a very structured environment, I was at a complete loss with my little corner of the family room. I had everything I needed, workwise, but the distractions were so loud! The laundry that had always been so innocent and quiet kept yelling at me, “Aw, come on, just put a load in! What can it hurt?” Suddenly the stray spoon in the sink was calling my name, the trash wanted to be emptied, and the living room was begging to be vacuumed. It was amazing to me that I never had heard these chores speak so loudly before, nor had I ever had such a strong urge to go to the post office, do my grocery shopping, and pick up the dry cleaning.

That noise all stopped when I rented a small office in an old converted school building, thank goodness. This may be something you need to consider as well, if you’re just starting and working out of your home. And if actually renting a separate space doesn’t work for you, think about taking over an entire room of your house and setting it up specifically as an office. With a door so you can’t hear the laundry.

2.) I thought I’d have this great wisdom to know how to direct and assess myself
I’ve always thought of myself as a pretty self-directed person, and many have called me ambitious and driven. I’ve always been entrepreneurial, even as a kid, and inside my various jobs while working for someone else. But I soon found it’s really easy to get off track without someone to report to, someone to give you an honest assessment of your progress.

The best ways I’ve found to wrangle with this particular challenge are these: an advisory board and mastermind groups.

Putting together an advisory board was one of the best things I did for myself in the early years. Every quarter, I’d invite my accountant, my financial planner, my insurance advisor, my attorney, and a marketing consultant to lunch, at the same time, pay them $50 each, and make a presentation to them about the state of my company, including financials, sales projections, and current projects. Then, I’d ask them for their advice. Boy, were they tough on me, and they expected progress from one quarter to the next, in many different areas. I prepared like mad for these meetings, and loved it.

After about 10 years, I discontinued the advisory board and substituted it with really strong mastermind groups and paid advisors. I make commitments for my business and share them with my mastermind friends, which still gives me that all-important accountability. A good business coach would be a great idea as well.

3.) I thought I’d be a naturally great leader and boss
I knew what needed to be done in my business and how to do it, so certainly I could tell others what to do. They’d blossom and grow under my wisdom and tutelage, taking care of the stuff I didn’t want to do. With others focused on the details, I could concentrate on the really important, wonderful aspects of my business — like making money.

Hmmmm. . . easier said than done. People are interesting. They’re all different. And none of them are exactly like me! I learned early on that I had to figure out a way to manage my staff well or spend the bulk of my time obsessing over their work and correcting it, and then resenting them for having to do it all myself.

I went through most of the Boss Myth management styles:

The La La Boss — hire ‘em and avoid ‘em
You know this style. “I don’t really want to manage people or ‘bother’ them — they’ll figure it out. . . I hope.”

The Helicopter Boss — hire ‘em and hover
This was one of my favorite styles. Since no one ever did anything exactly like I did, I felt I had to be looking over their shoulders at all times, telling them every minute detail of how to do it. I’d even examine their work after hours, leaving notes for them to find in the morning. (Imagine how they loved that!) Wasn’t getting much of my own work done that way, though.

The Expert Hirer — hire experts and let ‘em do it their way
This didn’t work for me. I didn’t want to butt heads with my team members. And anyway, I wanted it done my way, not theirs. Many business owners try this approach and learn later that they really don’t like the “expert’s” way, and then become a hybrid Expert Hirer/Helicopter Boss. This is doubly exhausting, as experts fight back.

Mr. Nice Guy — “I can save her!”
A recurring theme for me, as I kept ineffective employees way longer than I should have, thinking I could “fix” them.

The Boss Myth can waste years of your business’ life if you’re not aware of the stories we all buy into and how to work around them. Being the boss doesn’t have to be the pain it often turns out to be, and you don’t have to fall back on the old bossy ways you experienced in your employed life, either. There are better, more conscious choices you can make and systems you can put in place to banish the Boss Myth and make being a boss one of the most rewarding experiences of running a business.

Why did you go into business for yourself? Was it because:

• you had an idea that you couldn’t stop thinking about, an idea that you wanted to bring into reality?
• you could do something really well, better than anyone else, and you wanted to do it all the time?
• you were tired of doing things the way someone else wanted them done, when you knew you could do it better yourself?
• you had a passion, a burning desire that was bursting to be expressed?

You’re an entrepreneur, a business owner. And chances are, you didn’t start your business with a burning desire to be a manager of people.

I know I didn’t. When I started my marketing communications firm back in January, 1984, I had big dreams. I was going to be the most sought-after graphic designer around, my award-winning work would be seen in the top magazines representing the most prestigious clients. I’d be flamboyant and philosophical and utterly, utterly creative. And I wanted to be responsible to myself for how much money I made.

I was thrilled when my business grew quickly and I needed to add some people to help me, and I was sooooo shocked when I found out I had to be a manager.

Why didn’t these people know what to do? How was I supposed to know how to train them? Why did every problem end up on my desk? And if I spent all my time showing them what to do and answering their questions and checking their work, when was I going to have time to be flamboyant and philosophical and utterly, utterly creative? And how was I going to make any money?

It took me a long time to come to terms with the fact that:
employees = management = stress = time sucking activity = need to find a way to do it right.

I knew I needed employees if my business was going to grow, and if I was going to remain healthy and sane. A colleague in business for herself at the same time convinced me of that.

Susan’s story
Susan (not her real name) and I had very similar companies, so we would compare notes from time to time, and check in to see how the other was doing. When I hired my first employee I was so excited I could hardly wait to tell her, because I had discovered the compounding math of productivity: I could bill for my time, and I could bill for my employee’s time, and make double the money in the same amount of hours! When I told Susan of this intoxicating discovery and suggested she try it, I was surprised to learn of her fear. “But Marcia,” she said, “If I hire someone, I’ll have to pay them, and what if I don’t have enough money to pay them?”

I went through the calculations with her again, showing the profit margin of paying the employee out of the client billing, and billing the person out at a higher rate than you pay them, but it was all lost on Susan. Although she was always extremely busy, her fear of generating enough income held her back. So, as I continued adding employees and adding to my income, Susan continued working until late into the night, trying to meet client deadlines on her own. Our conversations changed, and things became strained. I tried to hold my enthusiasm back while she complained about missing family weddings, and not being able to spend time with her husband when he was in town, as he traveled and was out with clients a lot. Susan was always working, working, working, and her personal life was suffering. As we lost our common connection, we lost touch, and a few short years later, I read her obituary in the paper. She died of cancer, leaving her husband and two small children behind.

Susan’s story haunted me. It made me realize that I truly did need my team, I really did need help to run my business if I wanted to have a successful business and a successful life.

If you’ve hired employees, you’ve made the right decision, too. They can help your business grow, they can take some pressure off of you, they can support you, and they can help you make money.

If you haven’t read it yet, be sure to get a copy of my free report, “From Problem Team to Money-Making Machine.”

If you have it, take it out again and read it — there are some powerful strategies in there, don’t be fooled by their simplicity. And if you need a bit more help, take advantage of the Personalized Strategy Session offer at the end of the report, or the free Laser Coaching session. I can help guide you through the maze.